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October 2025

Mo	Tu	We	Th	Fr	Sa	Su
		1	2	3	4	5
6	7	8	9	10	11	12
13	14	15	16	17	18	19
20	21	22	23	24	25	26
27	28	29	30	31
	Birthdays
Uzz919 (29), FlowingEye (36), Karthus (35)
	Upcoming Events
Upcoming Birthdays: Uzz919 (29), FlowingEye (36), Karthus (35)

[Carnage]

HOW MEN AMUSE THEMSELVES IN TESCO'S:
 
 Proof of what can ha ppen if a wife or girlfriend  drags her husband or
 boyfriend along shopping
 
 This letter was sent by Tesco's Head Office to a  customer in Oxford :
 
 Dear Mrs. Murray,
 
 While we thank you for your valued custom and  use of the Tesco Loyalty
 Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is  considering banning you and
 your family from shopping with us, unless your  husband stops his antics.
 Below is a list of offences over the past few  months, all verified by
 our surveillance cameras:
 
 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and  randomly put them in people's
 trolleys when they weren't looking.
 
 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in  Housewares to go off at 5-minute
 intervals.
 
 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor  leading to feminine
 products aisle.
 
 4. July 19:20Walked up to an employee and told  her in an official tone,
 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what  happened.
 
 5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign  to a carpeted area.
 
 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor  clothing department and
 told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would  bring sausages and a
 Calor gas stove.
 
 7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked  if she could help him, he
 began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people  just leave me alone?'
 
 8. October 4: Looked right into the security  camera; used it as a
 mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
 
 9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing  kitchen knives in the
 Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew  where the antidepressants
 were.
 
 10. December 3: Darted around the store  suspiciously, loudly humming the
 Mission=2 0Impossible' theme.
 
 11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle,  practised the 'Madonna look'
 using
 different size funnels.
 
 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when  people browsed, yelled
 'PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'
 
 13. December 21: When an announcement came over  the loud speaker,
 assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO!  NO! It's those voices
 again.'
 
 And; last, but not least:
 
 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut  the door, waited a
 while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no  toilet paper in here.'
 
 
 Yours,
 Terri Munday.
 Tesco Customer Services.

[Hzza]

Good stuff! 14's my fave!

[Millicent Bystander]

I can barely real the screen I'm laughing so much.

This can't be real can it?

[mode_seven]

This can't be real can it?

It isn't yet. Give the members of this clan a few weeks.

[Zarf]

It's ancient, version I first saw was about Walmart

[Junta]

Nice

+1 Applaud

[Magathery]

LOL!

I am some what guilty of no:1

It's not my fault, Sainsburys had a special of buy one get one free on Durex lube. Also the vibrating cock rings are a good drop item. Just put them randomly into customer's baskets who aren't paying attention. OAP's are good candidates. Or people that do their own scanning & packing for the "Fast Pay" alise. They either don't notice and will find a special pressy when they get home. Or if they have a rescan - oh the look on their face. But it works for people who load their own stuff on to the convayor belt. The looks on theit face goes from "What the hell is this?" through to "What the F*CK!!!"

It's a great way to watch the world go by as your having a mug of tea in the cafe

In my deffence I'm promoting safe sex and encouraging people to try some thing new

[PapaFade]

lol, I think 13 is my fave

[egg]

LOL!

I am some what guilty of no:1

It's not my fault, Sainsburys had a special of buy one get one free on Durex lube. Also the vibrating cock rings are a good drop item. Just put them randomly into customer's baskets who aren't paying attention. OAP's are good candidates. Or people that do their own scanning & packing for the "Fast Pay" alise. They either don't notice and will find a special pressy when they get home. Or if they have a rescan - oh the look on their face. But it works for people who load their own stuff on to the convayor belt. The looks on theit face goes from "What the hell is this?" through to "What the F*CK!!!"

It's a great way to watch the world go by as your having a mug of tea in the cafe

In my deffence I'm promoting safe sex and encouraging people to try some thing new

lmao

After reading the OP I thought I might try that.... and you have to excellent results !!!  Can't wait to go shopping now