Magathery
WDG Lube Liason and Slippery Genius
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« Reply #45 on: September 26, 2009, 11:32:58 AM » |
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LOL  Creating a small fire from my hopes & dreams, I gently roast the chestnut while recreating Adam Ant's song "Stand & Deliver" with the Kazoo (even the thought of that make me smile). All the time trying to council the sponge. I raise you 3 pints of bile, a stale French stick and a 21 volume collection of the enciclopedia Britanica engraved into stilton.
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 May the Fluke be with you...
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r007
Supporting the Brits since 2008
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Bow before me, for I am root.
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« Reply #46 on: September 26, 2009, 11:40:50 AM » |
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I fill the bile back into the boomer it came out of, and stick the baguette on top. Clogged up like this his internal pressure rises, giving me time to build a little fort out of the cheesecyclopedia (hey, that's at least edible, well up to in a few seconds anyway) to hide away in. I watch as the boomer gently explodes.
I raise you a small pony, a seesaw, and 5 crates of Weißbier.
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  Ceterum censio RFC1855 esse legendam.
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Torgue
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« Reply #47 on: September 26, 2009, 11:48:09 AM » |
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I manage to convince the pony to drink 5 crates of Weißbier with me and we drunkenly get on the seesaw and start ... seesawing.
I raise you a French beret, a dandelion and a jewel-encrusted nail clipper.
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 COFFEEE POT WHY!
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Magathery
WDG Lube Liason and Slippery Genius
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AKA - Ripsaw
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« Reply #48 on: October 10, 2009, 10:23:53 AM » |
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Excellent. I needed to cut my nails. I need anti histamines due to the onset of hay fever brought on by the dandylions. I raise you 50 litres of red diesl, a Nissan micra full of Chaves and 38 tins of pilchards 
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 May the Fluke be with you...
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Torgue
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« Reply #49 on: October 10, 2009, 10:53:53 AM » |
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I cover the Micra with the red diesel, light it on fire and enjoy the fireworks while eating the pilchards with home-made white bread.
I raise you a broken microphone headset, some left over pizza (with pineapple) and a Magic 8-Ball TM
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 COFFEEE POT WHY!
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scroggage
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« Reply #50 on: October 10, 2009, 11:26:48 AM » |
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I use the Magic 8-Ball to divine my next move, so I follow its advice and repair the pizza and devour the headseat.
I raise you a box of lizards covered in intruder paint and a jar of antelope testicles.
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HeX
Clan Leader and "Little Scud Missile"
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« Reply #51 on: April 07, 2010, 10:20:20 PM » |
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I really feel the need to resurrect this one!!!
I stick the lizards all over a climbing wall (people shouldn't climb things, for fun, it's not fun!!) and leave the jar of testicles on the shelf thanks.
I raise you a wendy house with a banana flavoured front door and a pack of rabid squirrels riding a scooter! 
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Twiggeh
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ur a butt lol
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« Reply #52 on: April 07, 2010, 10:42:35 PM » |
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I see your Wendy house with banana flavoured door. I'll finish the job and paint the whole Wendy house banana flavoured and eat it. Then I take the squirrels and make a spray out of them  I raise you a creme egg mug and a hamper full of jizz-filled socks.
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WHOREING WHORE WHORE BITCHFACE  x x x x
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Guilt is a rope... etc
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« Reply #53 on: April 07, 2010, 10:50:29 PM » |
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I place the Mug delicately in the hamper arranging the socks as garnish and offer it as first prize in the church raffle. I raise you pink leotard and a pen shaped like a mexican (much <3 for bringing this back  )
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Magathery
WDG Lube Liason and Slippery Genius
Karma: 956
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AKA - Ripsaw
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« Reply #54 on: April 07, 2010, 11:23:14 PM » |
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I pull on the leotard and then realise I need to shave. As I wonder of in search of a razor, the pen turns out to be a real Mexican. Who then slopes off. But he leaves behind a sack of stoats, 3 used rail tickets to Invorness and beer mug covered in hyrogliphics 
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 May the Fluke be with you...
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Junta
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« Reply #55 on: April 08, 2010, 07:23:16 AM » |
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I wonder if a tutu might go with my leotard, and decide to go to Inverness to decide (as the people up there like to wear skirts anyway). I decide to bluff my way onto the train with the three used tickets...
I put the mug and stoats into my Peppa pig backpack. The ticket inspector asks me why I am wearing a small pink Peppa Pig backpack and matching t-shirt. He somehow believes that my used tickets are OK.
On the train I find a big comfy seat next to an old lady with more facial hair than a wolf. I find a rubber duck and a dirty magazine in the seat. The old lady offers me a dodgy looking toffee...
*edited as I forgot to pack the stoats*
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« Last Edit: April 08, 2010, 09:34:31 AM by Junta »
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scroggage
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« Reply #56 on: April 08, 2010, 02:33:18 PM » |
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I find that the lady actually IS a wolf. And the dirty magazine is a feature edition of her.
I feed the toffee to the rubber duck, who turns out to be ALIVE and to possess MAGICAL POWERS.
I wish for a kitchen table covered in Ming Vases and a lifetime supply of Polly Filla.
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Magathery
WDG Lube Liason and Slippery Genius
Karma: 956
Offline
Gender: 
Posts: 4374
AKA - Ripsaw
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« Reply #57 on: April 08, 2010, 07:36:33 PM » |
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I arrange the ming vases in such a way that a passing air current causes an errie acoustic to be produced. This sound keeps the mob of deliquent punk sparrows at bay that are doing their best to air drop caravans on me. Using the polly filler, I craft and sculpt a life size rendition of "Man with Fig Leaf", and once it's set rock hard, I use it to bludegen my way through the defensive lines of the sugar puff encrusted atnelops.
I rase you a doughnut that has been placed in Granny's green house. 56 yards of dental floss (mint flavored). Some pliyers. And a pink fluffy kitten called Clive.
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 May the Fluke be with you...
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Bl4ck
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« Reply #58 on: August 27, 2010, 09:13:17 PM » |
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I pick up the cat with the pliyers, tie it up with the dental floss, and force it to eat the donut in some sick fantasy.
I raise you a bottle of tip ex and a half pack of smokes.
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Magathery
WDG Lube Liason and Slippery Genius
Karma: 956
Offline
Gender: 
Posts: 4374
AKA - Ripsaw
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« Reply #59 on: August 27, 2010, 09:25:42 PM » |
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I use the tipex to blot out the huge health warning, as I still belive that they contain vitimins. Trying my best not to trip over the excited kiten and dental floss combo, I raise you 5 slightly soiled copies of Heat magazien, a packet of sherbert and 3 pairs of green torusers (38" regular). 
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 May the Fluke be with you...
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